Recently I read about another relic of the past being taken behind the wood shed and put down, in favor of a less problematic, modern replacement. “Turkey in the Straw,” the most common ice cream truck jingle, has been changed. The song’s 20th century version has no racist lyrics, but its melody has been traced back to the tune “Zip Coon,” a song performed in minstrel shows in the 1800’s. Good Humor, the world’s foremost ice cream truck supplier has teamed with the Wu Tang Clan’s RZA to compose a new ice cream truck song.
How socially enlightened! What an incredible puzzle to solve, with so many connections to follow. Minstrel shows, a 19th century Vaudeville act with often racist content, used a series of notes that was repurposed into another song over 100 years later, which was again repurposed into an unnamed tune on a popular type of ice cream truck music box, which has dominated the ice cream truck music market since the 1950s, which made the racist series of sounds audible to every child in America! This type of historical sleuthing is what will heal America and her uniquely awful racism problem. We must systematically eradicate these reminders of an era where equality was not enshrined into law, so that we don’t accidentally remember all the time.
To continue the good fight, I propose that we take a new stand against an industry that built itself on the backs of slaves: Cotton. Before you get dressed tomorrow, please check your garments’ tags for any cotton, even 1%. Why should we continue supporting this material, which has produced profits for slave owning plantation owners since our country’s founding? A material that the evil Confederacy fought a war for, and clothed their soldiers with? There is no single product today that bears more responsibility for our racism than cotton. Boycott cotton with me, stand strong against racism. No more t-shirts, no more Hane’s.